My husband Brandon has gone to Ethiopia the past two summers. Whenever he left I would lay on the guilt trip about him being gone for two weeks. He was always very gracious and kind toward me during my childish episodes but what he should have done is taken me by the shoulders and shouted at me, “You have no clue the difficulties of the world and the grace with which they handle them. Two weeks is nothing in relationship to eternity.”
This year he asked me to come along. My initial response was “No”. How could we possibly leave our four children for two weeks? How would they survive without one of us to parent, to take care of their every need or control how their days went? Really what I was more concerned with was controlling my life. After many discussions, much praying and planning and a bit of worrying I said “Yes” to accompanying Brandon to Ethiopia for his third trip.
God in His infinite wisdom knew I needed to be here and see this remarkable country and meet these beautiful people. I am humbled that I get to be here. I have cried tears of joy as I am experiencing this place and its people, being with the Bring Love In children. I have wept in my bed at night as I think of the Ethiopian people who have humbly served me. I am praying for God to continue to soften my heart.
I see the ugliness within me that comes out daily and it makes me want to weep. How can I be so shallow about this life? The desires of my heart are not something I want to publicly admit. My desires and daily prayers have not been for more love, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness or humbleness. My desires reflect where my treasures lie. Jesus warned me, “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth where moths and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven where moths and rust do not destroy and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is there your heart will be also.”